Sex Ed.

I have to say I'm fairly uncomfortable with the presentation of sex on television. It's not really the quantity of it that we hear mentioned on TV shows, but rather the cavalier manner in which it's dealt with. Shows like "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" display high school students with an alarmingly promiscuous lifestyle. Now I'm like any red-blooded guy, but I still think there's rules that should be kept in place when it comes to dealing with sex.

First of all, I'm annoyed at the way guys are often portrayed in these scenarios. We're either pushy to have sex or just drooling idiots when in the presence of a topless girl. There has been so much talk about how females are presented on TV that we don't often hear about the guys side. Shows like "Two and a Half Men" could be used as an interesting example. The women that are paraded through that show are always gorgeous and buxom and dumb. Charlie Sheen has his fun and then tosses them aside. Certainly not a winning score for either gender. Alan, his brother in the show falls into the goofy, drooling, awkward with girls category which is equally disappointing. I miss shows like "Fraiser". Not so much for Kelsey Grammar's namesake, but for David Hyde Pierce's character of Niles. He was moon eyed (pun intended) over Daphne, but once they were in a relationship his character was very grounded and three dimensional. He was first a person, and a man second. It was refreshing to see on television. These days there's so much trash TV (I'm looking at you MTV) that the sexes are shown in such an ill-light I'd be embarrassed no matter which gender I was.

Call me old fashioned, but I believe in a certain amount of discretion and responsibility when it comes to sex. I think we're heading in the wrong direction to be so liberal about all of it. You know where I stand on deviant sexuality choices (bi, gay, etc.) and this is just more of the same. Somewhere along the line we were told that we should be totally comfortable with our bodies, and that sex is nothing to be ashamed of. We took that message and twisted and perverted it so that sex lost any significance it may have once carried. I've heard talk from students as young as thirteen years old who mention their first sexual encounter, saying it happened because they were bored. Bored! You know what I did when I was thirteen and bored? I played a video game or went out back and burned something in the fire pit. Hell, I wasn't talking to girls in any meaningful capacity until I was 18. I admit I wasn't exactly a player in high school, but when I think about the number of ugly people with children, I really don't think my looks were going to keep me from fooling around.

We need to establish a sense of importance back into the world of sex. We need to empower it once again, and make it something important. In some religions, sex was the path to true enlightenment and to God. It doesn't really get much more important than that, does it? Many parents these days are teaching their kids that sex is okay and nothing to be ashamed of. I think statements like this need to include addenda that stipulate that sex before a certain age is forbidden. There's too many kids dropping out of school because of pregnancy, too many sexual assaults happening because people have been fed inappropriate ideas about sex. We need to scare our children again, and set them straight. I know if I have kids and they ask me about sex, I'll tell them two things; the purpose of sex, and the perils involved therein. Then I'll beat them with a sack of potatoes if I find they've been screwing around. Once their 18 I'll ease up, but to think that children (and they are children) are fornicating before they fully understand their own bodies is mind-boggling. You require incredible amounts of documentation to get your firearms licence along with testimonials from people in your life assuring the government you're not going to go on a killing rampage. This should be the same for sex. We should issue sex licences. There's too many stupid people going out and making babies that will grow up in broken homes only to become fourteen and get knocked up to make more stupid babies. I think that government issued sex licences should be implemented. Included in these would be tests for IQ, genetic disease and hereditary quirks.

I can hear you now, "Something, something Master Race, something, something."